This isn't the first time a group of people or even an individual has just turned on me like this, and I am very sure it won't be the last time. It would be very easy for me to get depressed about this and start to think maybe there is something wrong with me, it can't be everyone else, can it!
But then I analyse what it is they are saying about me and realise that probably most INTJ females have been through this kind of thing, time and time again.
I seem to have spent my life trying to explain to people that I didn't mean something the way they assumed I did when I say something that they take completely the wrong way. It is like I am talking a different language to these people, they assume I am angry and being nasty when in reality I am very calm and just giving facts or details the way I see them. For me dealing with other people has been a minefield all my life. I never know when one of them is going to explode into a rage and start accusing me of being arrogant or aggressive when I simply wasn't being like that at all.
They often accuse me of thinking I am better than them or using fancy words. Or the other end of the spectrum when they see a mistake I make because of my dyslexia, where I can spell correctly but swap out a word completely (e.g.: quite, quiet), and use this as a way to belittle me and try to make out that I am really dumb. I can't win on that score. I know my limitations and when someone points out mistakes I make I am grateful to them for pointing it out so I can correct it.
However, if I am the one to point something out to someone in a calm way just so they know about it, they think I am being nasty and arrogant. No, I would just rather someone tell me, so I think they would rather know too.
In a discussion where I disagree about something with someone, on a topic I know a lot about, I do my best to show the other person why I believe what I do, and why I won't accept their view about it. To me this doesn't mean we have to argue about it or get upset, we can agree that it is something we will never see eye to eye on, but it is no reason to hate each other or get angry. But again so many have turned on me for daring to have an opinion different to theirs. This has happened so often that now most of the time I just refuse to discuss it any further because I know it will end in them getting upset.
So maybe at the heart of my problems is my independence of thought and my unwillingness to conform to their way of doing things, just so I can fit in with the crowd. I don't understand why a group of people cannot be a group of individuals with opinions and ideas of their own. I don't understand why we have to think and act like everyone else to be accepted or be deemed acceptable.
People are in general scared of anything or anyone different I guess, and whereas I love to meet interesting, unique and unusual people, they see them as a threat somehow. A threat to the controlled little groupthink they have going? After all, they don't want their ideas questioned or for anything to change, people are so scared of change, they will do anything to avoid it.
So no, there is nothing wrong with me. I am just being me and yes I am a Goddess, every woman who allows herself to be is.
Yes I do care very deeply for people who are close to me, and no there aren't that many, but they are genuine and not friends with me because of some ego feeding narcissism groupthink. They are individuals too.
I wrote this article because I am sure other INTJ females get this kind of reaction to them too, since getting to know more INTJ females in the group it makes me realise there is nothing wrong with me after all, and there is nothing wrong with you either.