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3 Reasons Why People Don't Like You.



If you have ever asked yourself, "Why don't people like me?" then let me help you to understand some of the reasons that could be causing you problems.


I also offer some solutions which, if you are disturbed by your rejection, you might want to consider implementing.

1. You're more successful than them.

I am not talking being mega-rich because most people look up to and admire those people, I am talking about you being just a bit more successful than someone.

Why will this cause people to not like you?

It makes the other person feel inferior and not good enough, so they will choose to like and hang around with others who are in a similar economic situation as them.

This also goes for academia. If you have a higher level of academic qualifications than them, don't expect them to like you, having you around will just make them feel like a failure.

How to overcome this.

If you want these people to like you, you must be humble and play down your achievements.

2. You're a know it all.

As INTJs we spend a LOT of time researching and gaining new knowledge. We even manage to change our beliefs when we find evidence contrary to what we first thought could be true.


However, once we have done all the research and made a decision, we know clearly within our own mind that we have now found the truth of that matter and we move on to the next topic.


If someone later comes along and talks about a subject we have full knowledge of and have therefore come to a conclusion about it, we are not afraid to tell someone they are wrong about it and provide all the evidence as such. To which the other person, who has strong views to the contrary, does one of two things, they fight, and inevitably lose and end up hating you for it, or they take flight, as they don't want to accept the truth.

How to overcome this.

If you want people to like you, people who hold different views from your own, stop feeling the need to convince them they are wrong. It doesn't really matter what someone else believes anyway.

3. You don't bond with them.

I know, I know, small talk sucks and seems so pointless and irritating. However, talking about the weather and other random useless chit-chat is what starts the bonding process between two people.

Complaining about the rain or it being too hot, and you both agreeing and sympathising with each other is what starts two strangers bonding. If you skip this part and jump straight into something technical on first meeting someone they will see you as cold and unapproachable. I get that you are just being efficient when you go to a work colleague and ask them for xyz, rather than asking how they are and complaining about the weather before getting to the point, but other more emotion-based beings will just think you are an arrogant jerk.

You are probably the hardest worker in the company, but even your boss hates you. This is why - you don't take time to bond with people.

How to overcome this.

When you need something from someone at work, or anywhere really, remember to do a little bit of general small talk first, make the other person feel at ease and happy to be dealing with you.


Something to remember.

INTJs are intimidating to mere mortals, INTJ females are doubly so! If you remember that people are often scared of you and feel inferior to you, you will remember to be a little bit kinder to them.





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